Inspirational Articles

Don't Cry Because It's Over

By Graham John Hunt | Submitted On February 28, 2015



Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened. - Dr Seuss

I was first introduced to this concept by a friend when, after thirty years of donating blood, it was discovered that because of my health history I should not have been donating at all. Not that my blood was dangerous, but there was a higher than acceptable risk to me as a donor.

I was initially quite upset by that. I had originally started donating because my mother had developed a condition that required regular transfusions and because we were the same blood type, it was something I could do to support her at the time. Not that I expected my mother would necessarily receive my blood, but my donations could replace the blood taken from the reserves for her needs.

But, as my friend, gently suggested, "be grateful that you were able to give thirty years of donations, that, under the normal scheme of things, you would not have been able to give." That turned the whole thing around.

I had been provided with an opportunity that, for all intents and purposes, I should not have had. At the time it gave me a sense of being able to do something other than stand by and watch my mother dying. I continued donating long after my mother eventually died, as one way in which I could provide for others who needed what, it seemed, I was able to provide.

Then suddenly, it was stopped. Rather than feel that my offer was being rejected, I can be thankful for the contribution I was able to make and the good those donations did for the people who received the products that came from those donations.

There is a sense where throughout life there are beginnings and there are endings. Sometimes something needs to end so there can be a new beginning. Sometimes those endings are painful, such as the ending of a relationship, or the death of a loved one.

It seems to me there is little value in dwelling on the loss that ending brings to your life. Sure, there is a time to grieve, and that is appropriate. But once the grieving is over, there is also the opportunity to be grateful for the opportunities that particular situation, although now ended, provided for you. That to me is a far more respectful way of dealing with the experiences of your life than living in regret, dwelling on the "what if... ?" questions or the "if only... " scenarios that really do not resolve anything.

I personally have found a great deal of value in having an attitude of gratitude towards those things in my past. There is a very real sense in which I am the person I am today because of the experiences I have had. By being grateful, even for those that I would have preferred not to end, I am in a far better position to make the most of the situations I am currently in, without dragging the regrets from the past into the present with, perhaps undesired consequences for the future.

Graham Hunt (a.k.a. an Old Bald Dreamer) is a writer. That is not just what he does; It's who he is. After twenty years of self directed learning, he is not making what he has learned in that time available for you. His writing can be found at http://www.grahamjhunt.com.

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